A desire to write has hit me. Especially in the mornings seconds after breakfast. I could describe it as an impulse, a habit or an inner compulsion. But it wouldn’t be fun. Instead I call it a desire. It makes me want to create new texts every day. Since I am pushed by desire the texts will lack in precision and content. Technically, my writing is of mediocre quality. It has many weak points. Some are the attitude I have towards a reader, my language, my style, my word knowledge, and my referencing.
In terms of content, the texts spread in all possible directions. At least according to the analytical part of my mind. At the same time, I do not understand why I was hit by this desire and why it is constantly urging me to do what I do. But you can’t understand everything. As an adult, I have finally accepted that this is the case. But unconsciously I am frequently guided by a younger versions of myself. I then act as if it is required of me to understand everything. A concrete example is the following. For a long time I have avoided speaking up and telling anyone appealing to me: “Now I get confused, this I do not understand at all, explain until I understand”. These were words that I should have started to use years ago.
Göran Stille 
Wise words.
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…maybee, your writing has become a habit. It is hard to change habits…
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What habits have you chosen to change? That is what evidence do you have to support your statement? Wha do you believe the consequence is for me when you say that something I describe as a desire, you say is a habit?
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Please tell me, what was the effect of my suggestion. I have no idea.
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I pushed myself to avoid thinking in old tracks. That is to regard what I do when I write as something else than a desire. That is explicitly expressed in my text. Thus I feel as if you have given me a bucket of ice-cold water on me. I feel discouraged when I need the opposite.
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I am sorry for that. Please forgive me. My intention was not to insult.
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Apology accepted!
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Hello, DLOWF. :)) I think you’re amazing! You’re always asking for clarification, in my books! I love that.
But yes… my humble advice is… listen to that younger-you voice. Then it starts to get really damned fun. 😈🌀😇🎉🎩🐣✨
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“Listen to that younger-me voice” was your advice. Well, I think that is a problem. That younger voice is pushing me to understand beyond my capacity to understand. It is tiresome and not that fun. I have to adopt a position being more lay-back and relaxed. Giving room for just having fun. I need to hear that voice from the younger than young-me. For me, this is hard work. That part of me has nor words at all and thus no voice!
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Ah, okay…. well, I have been someplace like there, too. For me it was an internal war between my inner child and my inner critic… once they made friends, it became easier for me. But everyone’s different.
I’m just happy you’re posting your thoughts… that’s what blogging’s all about… and we can gain creative energy from blog-friendships, sometimes.
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